Has somebody ever asked you for advice? Have you ever given someone godly counsel? Do you live by the same godly counsel you give?

If you give someone guidance or try to direct them in a certain way, yet you don’t live by that same standard, you just might be a hypocrite. You may feel like you are helping someone navigate a situation, but it’s not helpful when you’re not backing up your advice with your actions. When your walk doesn’t match your talk, it impacts your testimony for Christ.

When you say one thing, but you do something entirely opposite, it affects the people that you’re trying to help. It puts a stumbling block between lost people (or even backslidden sinners) and the Lord.  What is a hypocrite? How does the bible define a hypocrite? The word “hypocrite” in the original Greek language means “an actor under an assumed character,” or “a stage player.” The idea is that you are giving the impression that you’re acting out something that’s not a true depiction of reality. It’s a story; a pretend, make believe, imaginary thing – yet you are giving the “counsel” or “advice” as your reality, as if you live your life by the standard you preach. You’re pretending that’s who you are, but behind closed doors it’s a mask that you wear.

So, how do we know if we’re a hypocrite? What are some signs? You might be a hypocrite if what? The first example I can think of is relationships. There are certain people who love to give relationship advice, but they have been through 7 or 8 or 14 relationships of their own that never stick. That’s a hypocrite. Another example would be people who are chronic gossipers. They share the dirt on others all the time, but then they will go and counsel someone not to gossip. A hypocrite could also be someone who is quick to preach biblical principles and commandments to others (a spouse, a friend, etc) urging them to live according to God’s Word, while failing to obey God’s Word themselves. This is sometimes seen as having a “holier-than-thou” attitude.  The hypocritical person will act like the bible only applies to others, while they, themselves, are exempt. Friends, this is wrong.

Jesus constantly called out the hypocrites in the New Testament. He told the Pharisees and religious leaders and scribes that they were holding other people to strict standards that even they personally were unwilling to follow. When Jesus was confronted by the religious leaders concerning the woman who committed adultery, He told them, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone” (John 8:7).

So why does it matter whether or not we are hypocrites? What difference does it make if we have hypocritical behavior or not? What effect does it have on us or other people? When you act like a hypocrite, it makes you a stumbling block for the people who are trying to live right. If they’re looking at you as the example of what a believer should be doing and saying, and you’re only saying it and not doing it, then you’re inhibiting their walk with the Lord and their growth. If you’re not open and honest and transparent with others, you’re going to cause them to stumble because you are not living by what you’re saying. Your walk does not match your talk. When you continue to live with hypocritical behavior, it keeps you from getting the help that you need as well. If you’re always faking it, trying to make it seem like you’ve got things under control and are doing things the right way, but you’re really not – no one’s going to know that you need help.

Not only is a hypocrite affected by his own deceiving life, as well as those to whom he imparts godly counsel, but he also hurts lost people – people who don’t know the Lord or don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus. If we are image bearers of Christ, if we bear His name because we are saved and born again, then we are supposed to be living by a higher standard. We’re to be living by the Word of God. Jesus tells us in John 14:15, “If you love me, keep my commandments.” The bible should be governing our lives: what we say, what we think, and what we do. When the lost world looks at us and they see us saying one thing but yet doing another, they will question the reason for going to church and receiving salvation. If even believers don’t follow what they preach, then why should lost people follow Jesus and worry about their faith? They will look at believers as hypocrites and decide they don’t want to be one too.  

When a believer acts like a hypocrite, it hurts their testimony and cripples their witness. The Apostle Paul reminds us in Romans 12:2 to be set apart and not conformed to this world, but rather transformed by the renewing of our mind. How does that happen? By reading God’s Word and applying it. The lost world needs to see us being set apart just like we’re called to be. Backslidden believers and those who are newly saved as well as those who are weak in their faith will all benefit from seeing strong, mature believers living and walking what they preach.

It is good to give godly counsel; it is better when our walk matches that counsel we give. How do we make sure we are living in a right way, according to God’s Word? How do we make sure that the godly counsel we give is not beneath us? After all, we should never counsel someone to do what we are unwilling to do ourselves. Whenever we counsel others, we should be walking what we’re talking. In order to do that – in order to be prepared to give godly counsel as we live a life that is in alignment with God’s Word, we need to obey God’s Word. We need to preach the Gospel to ourselves before we can preach it to other people. By humbling ourselves and being in a right standing with the Lord, before we share godly counsel with someone else, we put ourselves in a position where we can share our testimony. We can be humble and transparent before them and admit that we don’t get it right all the time, but with God’s help we were able to get our walk and talk in alignment with the bible. This is a process that is outlined for us in Matthew 7:5 where we are told, “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”

The Apostle Paul gives us a word of caution in Galatians 6:1, and it’s good, godly counsel for those who give godly counsel to others. He says, “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any sin, you who are spiritual are to restore such a person in a spirit of gentleness, keeping a watchful eye on yourself, so that you are not tempted as well.” The last part of that verse is so important! We need to be careful when we are “helping” others because we may be tempted by their same sin or tempted to sin because of their situation and our intimate involvement. For example, people who struggle with porn or lust on their technology devices may ask for accountability from you, not knowing that as you help them monitor their devices you are tempted because of your past struggles with porn or lust. That other person may not know that you have that struggle or that their request for accountability puts you at risk to relapsing back into that sinful pattern. It may not be an active or current struggle for you and you may feel confident helping that friend, but when you start to get involved with accountability steps, you could be triggered by that temptation. So the Apostle Paul’s warning in Galatians 6:1 should be taken seriously.

It’s comforting to have someone in the flesh to go to, someone we can call or text or visit and receive godly counsel. There is no shame in asking, “Can you help me? “Can you give me guidance?” “Can you point me in the right direction?” But we also need to realize that we are just human – we are limited in our knowledge. However, there is One greater than us Who we need to always be pointing people to. If you are the one giving godly counsel, you need to always be pointing others to Jesus. If you are looking for godly counsel or receiving it, you too need to always be looking to Jesus. Seek God first and foremost. It’s okay to seek a trusted, godly brother or sister in Christ. We’re even told in Proverbs 15:22, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” We’re also told in Proverbs 27:9, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” But it’s important to know that there is One greater who gives the ultimate counsel and that is God. He knows our hearts. He knows what is in us. He knows when our walk doesn’t match our talk and yet he still loves us. He knows the worst about us, that we are sinners. God tells us in His Word that there is none righteous, no not one. We are all sinners. We have all fallen short of the glory of God, and He knows that – but yet He loves us, and His desire is for us to have a personal relationship with Him. So, if you’re reading this and you don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus, if you have never placed your faith in Christ and received salvation, then please don’t wait.  The bible tells us in Romans 10:9-10 that if we confess with our mouths Jesus as Lord and believe in our hearts that God raised Him from the dead, we will be saved. Through Christ, God has given us that opportunity to confess that we’re sinners. Will you do that today? Will you confess that you’re a sinner? Will you place your faith in the Lord Jesus and receive salvation? There is no greater time than now!