We were visiting my husband’s grandma one weekend and I noticed she had this little bronze figurine sitting on her desk and it had two boys. One boy was giving the other boy a piggyback ride and the writing on the base of the little figurine said, “He’s not heavy, he’s my brother.” I thought about that from time to time, and over the years I’ve gone back to that phrase and applied it to the work we do for the Lord.

I can just picture this little kid as he’s giving his brother a piggyback ride, and it’s probably one of his parents or another adult who confronts him and says, “Hey put him down, he’s heavy.” And the boy replies, “He’s not heavy, he’s my brother.” Sometimes with the work we do for the Lord, we may be helping other women and people may tell us, “She’s heavy, put that down.” We may reply, “No, she’s not heavy. She’s my sister and I don’t mind carrying her burden.”

It seems there are those who are not willing to get involved and bear one another’s burdens at all. They are the ones who say, “She’s heavy”, or “That’s heavy,” or “That’s messy. I don’t want to get my hands in that.” Then it seems there are some who say, “She’s not heavy” because there’s a joy that comes with serving. There’s a joy in helping others or being a listening ear. Either way, it’s an attitude of the heart. For those who say, “She’s not heavy, she’s my sister,” it should come from a pure motive and joy to serve the Lord and to love Him with our whole being. When we have the mindset that it is not a burden to help one another, but rather an honor and privilege to serve, we express compassion and concern for others, and we have a genuine desire to help them. As we carry the burdens of our sisters in Christ, though, there’s also a word of caution for those who carry too much. We need to find a balance.

What does the bible say about carrying the burdens of others or helping others?

Galatians 6:2-5 says, “Share each other’s burdens and in this way obey the law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important. Pay careful attention to your own work for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else for we are each responsible for our own conduct.”  

Galatians 6: 10 says, “Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.”

1 Timothy 5:8 says, “Those who won’t care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers.”

We see the example in Scripture with Ruth and Naomi, where Ruth is carrying the burden of providing for Naomi. She goes to find food and she works to take care of her mother-in-law. She didn’t have to, but she genuinely wanted to do this for Naomi. She had a genuine desire to show compassion and concern. Sometimes life is not planned in that way where we decide in advance to carry a burden for someone. Sometimes God interrupts our day and gives us an opportunity to serve Him. In those instances, we must be ready and willing to help and serve where He’s calling us. We see an example of this divine interruption in the parable of the good Samaritan in Luke 10:30-37. The Jewish man was traveling from Jerusalem down to Jericho and he gets attacked. His clothes are taken, and he is beaten and left half dead by the road. The bible says the priest comes by and sees the injured man and passes him by on the other side of the road. Then the bible says a temple assistant walks by and sees the man lying there, but he walks by on the other side just like the priest. But then a Samaritan comes along, and he sees the man and he feels compassion for him and goes over and helps him.  Where is your heart? What are your motives? Are you willing to let God interrupt your day? When God provides an opportunity to be His hands and feet, do you make excuses, or do you willfully help?

Perhaps it’s not the divine interruptions we have the problem with, but rather the issues that are planned and scheduled. For example, perhaps it’s simply giving a friend a ride to church or taking a family member to a doctor’s appointment. Maybe it’s meeting a friend for bible study or taking a meal to someone who just had surgery. Some things in life are not unexpected. We have an advance notice of a need that is coming up, but instead of being willing to carry that burden, we find something else to do so we can avoid having to use our time, talent, and resources in a way that doesn’t fit our agenda.

Hebrews 10:24-25 says, “Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of His return is drawing near.”

Philippians 2:4 says, “Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.”

The Christian walk is not a solo race. You don’t do it alone; it’s one that you need community for. We all need each other. We have an encouragement from the Apostle Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5:14, “Brothers and sisters, we urge you to warn those who are lazy, encourage those who are timid, take tender care of those who are weak, be patient with everyone.” It takes work to help each other and it can get messy supporting each other, but it’s what we are called to do. Thank the Lord for those who have come alongside us in our time of need and helped us. Why would we not turn around and return the favor? Why would we not do what we can to pass that blessing on to others?  

What are some things that prevent or inhibit believers from helping each other and carrying the burdens of others?

• We think being involved in other people’s lives is too time-consuming.
• We think people are just annoying and we don’t feel like dealing with them.
• We think spending that time to help is a waste and we have other things we would rather be doing.
• We overthink the process or want to “get it done” within 10 minutes with as little inconvenience as possible to our own day.

Sometimes we have very legitimate reasons for hesitating before carrying the burdens of others:

• Maybe we have too much going on mentally and emotionally already and we don’t want to overextend ourselves.
• Maybe our plate is already full and there physically isn’t any room left to help others.
• Maybe we feel inadequate or unequipped physically or financially to take on their burden.

No one can decide for you, whether or not you should carry a particular sister’s burden. That is a decision you have to make with the Lord’s wisdom and discernment. Whenever you have an opportunity presented to you, don’t make a decision until you pray about it. Take it to the Lord and ask Him if you should help or pass because He already knows what is on your plate. He knows what you should be doing and what needs to be left for someone else.

If you have been praying about helping others, but you don’t know where to start, here are some things to consider:

• How can you challenge yourself to do just one thing?
• What is just one step you could take today to try to carry the burdens of others?
• Who do you know that is going through some busy or trying times and may need assistance or prayer or a meal?
• Who can you call or text and give encouragement to this week?
• Have you prayed and asked the Lord to help you take this step of obedience?

What about those of you who may be carrying the burdens of others already, but instead of one sister on your back, you are giving piggy-back to four or five sisters? Perhaps your motives are genuine, and you have pure joy in helping and serving in a variety of ways. That is wonderful! However, amid your full plate, be alert for those sisters along the way who may come near and ask, “Can we help you carry this burden?” Be cautious that pride doesn’t swoop in and cause you to become a “blessing hog.” We need to be careful when we are doing so many things that others can’t edge in and serve alongside us. As the saying goes, “There is no ‘I’ in ‘team’.” Someone else may have been praying and asking the Lord for ways to get involved and serve and He may have been asking them to take a step of obedience. Don’t hinder their opportunity to be a blessing.

However, if you are beginning to feel weighed down with all those sisters on your back, please practice the art of delegation! Speak up and communicate with others that you simply cannot get everything done and that you need help. If someone asks you to help them, and you know there is no way you can meet their need, ask their permission to share their need with another sister in Christ who does have the capacity to help carry their burden. If you don’t be honest with yourself, but instead continue to load the burdens of others on your back, eventually you will burn out. You will be tempted to become jaded and develop a strong dislike for those you are trying to help.

So how do we find a balance? How do we find a balance between doing nothing at all to help others and being so overloaded we’re doing everything and overwhelmed? Where is that balance? We find some wisdom in 2 Corinthians 8:3 where it says, “They gave as much as they were able.” That verse deals with money, but the concept is still applicable regarding our time, talents, and resources. God has work just for you and He has work for someone else, and it may be that today the work He has for you is stepping out in obedience and meeting a friend for lunch or just being a listening ear to their current struggles and offering them wisdom and a discerning heart. Or maybe today the work God has for someone else is to step out in confidence and boldness and witness to somebody at the gas station. And yet for another person, it looks like mowing the yard for a neighbor who just had surgery. Not only is the type of load you carry different from the load of others, but the size of that load. What you may be able to do is just simply help someone by calling them or sending a bible verse through text. Maybe today you’re just able to drop off groceries for a family in need, while someone else may be able to witness to someone at their workplace and lead a bible study and do everything else all in the same day. It doesn’t mean that one of you is holier than the other. It doesn’t mean that one of you is more spiritually mature than the other. Neither one of those examples describes a person who has arrived at perfection in their walk with the Lord. The burden you carry for others is customizable to you in each season of your life. The things that you are able to do now may not be the same things that you are able to do five or ten years from now. And if we’re honest, we could say they probably weren’t the things that you were able to do five or ten years ago.

It’s tempting when we are running the Christian race to look over at our sister in Christ in the lane beside us and we start to get insecure about our level of serving, and so we’re really quick to cast stones at that sister in the lane beside us and tell her, “Hey! Put that down. She’s heavy!” But we fail to consider that maybe it’s not heavy for her. That sister they are carrying is a sister who has a need to be met. And the sister carrying her is being obedient to what God has called them to do. We don’t know what God has laid on everybody’s heart. We are not privy to God’s calling on other people. They know the plans that God has for them, if they are in tune with the Spirit and sensitive to His guidance, reading their bible and praying. If God laid it on their heart to help carry the burdens of those sisters, then they’re doing what they’re supposed to be doing. Cheer them on!

God is sovereign. He’s holy. He is just. He is faithful. He is true. And He accomplishes His work through faithful people who obey Him and who allow themselves to be used by Him. God uses His children to do His work, so if you’re thinking that you would love to be a part of making a difference in somebody else’s life but you haven’t accepted Christ’s sacrifice for you and received salvation that comes from Him alone, that is your first step. Are you a child of God? Do you know who Christ is? Do you have a personal relationship with Him? The bible tells us in Romans 3:10-12 that no one’s perfect. There’s none righteous, no, not one. We’ve all sinned, but the awesome news is that Romans 5:8 tells us, “While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” Jesus’s death on the cross is what made a way for us to return to God and be reconciled to Him and spend eternity in heaven with Him. That is the Good News! So what will you do? Will you place your faith in Christ and believe His Word? Do you believe Jesus is who He said He is? Do you believe that He died to forgive you of your sins? Do you believe that God raised Jesus to life and that He’s reigning in heaven today? Then tell Him that. Confess with your mouth and believe in your heart (Romans 10:9-10) and He will save you.  And if you’ve accepted this gift of salvation, welcome to the family of God!