Ministry can look many different ways depending on who you are, where you live, and what you do. For some of us, ministry can be a career – it’s something we do day in and day out and receive a paycheck each month. For others, it can be a volunteer opportunity to serve the Lord. Perhaps you serve at a local outreach, or maybe you help with the women’s ministry at your local church. Some of you may hold a bible study in your home each week, or visit members of your church who are home bound/shut in. Whatever you may called to do in ministry, it is always an opportunity to impact lives for Christ and it fills us with purpose and joy. However, it’s not always easy! From spiritual warfare to burnout, and criticism to loneliness, the challenges of ministry can really feel overwhelming at times. It doesn’t matter if you have a leadership position in your church or you’re teaching a life group class on Sunday mornings. It doesn’t matter if you’re discipling other believers or simply living out your faith in your community. At some point in your ministry service, you may more than likely find yourself in sticky or difficult situations or faced with moments of doubt, exhaustion, or even frustration.
There are parts of ministry people don’t always talk about like why conflict happens, what struggles we face, or how we can stay faithful to the calling, encouraged, and anchored in God’s Word even when the road gets tough. Many times, while serving in ministry, we may experience selfishness, hurt feelings, temptations to micromanage the Lord’s work, or control the actions of other people. We’re human after all; and when serving with other humans, conflict seems bound to happen. How we handle problems in ministry will make a big difference in our life when we can handle those problems effectively, and it requires spiritual wisdom.
Colossians 3:16, “Let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching, and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs.”
Colossians 3:16 gives us three ways the Word of God should dwell in our lives: wisdom, teaching, and admonishing. Teaching and admonishing often times can appear the same, but there’s actually a difference. When you’re teaching, you’re imparting truth and knowledge. When you admonish, it’s usually regarding things that are wrong. However, it’s really important that all three of those things went together in that verse because you can’t effectively admonish without teaching or having wisdom. You need the wisdom from the Lord to discern things that are wrong. You need to teach with gentleness and love while you’re admonishing because you can’t just accuse people of doing the wrong thing. You have to be able to back it up with Scripture and help them to correct their wrong behavior. There’s another verse that comes to mind where we find the Apostle Paul using that word “admonish” and teaching us in his own season of ministry. No doubt the Apostle Paul experienced the many burdens that come with ministry. It was one of his reasons for writing to the believers in Rome.
Romans 15:14, “Now I myself am confident concerning you my brethren that you are also full of goodness, filled with all knowledge, able also to admonish one another.”
Paul wrote to the believers to remind and encourage them to do what they knew was right. We’re not only able to do the admonishing, but we’re also able to receive admonishment – and that’s something that nobody wants to do. Nobody ever wants to be on the receiving end of admonishing, but it’s so necessary. We really need to heed the warning and the caution that’s found in God’s Word – even when it’s not popular. Even when it doesn’t make friends. We may have the fear of offending others, but we need to admonish others when needed and we also need to receive that admonishing from others.
Remember, we are dealing with sinners – including ourselves. We get in our flesh. We get selfish. We want to be in control of things. We want to handle the outcome. We want to be in the planning process and make decisions. We’re not perfect, but neither is anybody else. That’s what makes it so difficult: imperfect people serving side by side, trying to serve the Lord. Conflict is inevitable and at times opposition will be as well. We will have differing viewpoints, but we need to be careful and have an open mind toward our brothers and sisters in Christ. We need to be able to be pleasant to work with, be full of grace and mercy toward others that we serve with; and while there is a time and a place for admonishment. The Bible does a good job helping us know when it is appropriate and how our words are to be delivered. The Bible also does a good job explaining the process of handling conflict within the body of believers and it’s found in Matthew 18: confront the person directly and if they don’t listen, we are to take another believer with us to confront that person. If the person is still not receptive to correction, then we take it to the staff at church (the pastor, the ministry leader, elder, or deacon).
What if you don’t feel the issue is “serious,” “grave,” or “major”? Maybe it’s just a situation where you are upset about something or frustrated that things aren’t going the way that you think they should. In those cases, sometimes it’s helpful to just take a step back and remove yourself from the situation because it’s not always about you and it’s not always about the people making decisions or the way that things are getting done. What’s more important is who is being served, how they’re being helped, and that the service being done is in a way that glorifies God. What’s so wonderful is that God has given us the Bible – His complete Word, from Genesis to Revelation – and all of it gives us so much counsel on life in general, including what we can apply to ministry.
• We’re encouraged to build each other up: 1 Thessalonians 5:11, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up as you are already doing.”
• We’re encouraged to bear with one another: 2 Timothy 2:24, “The Lord’s servant must not quarrel but must be gentle to everyone, able to teach, and patient.”
These are helpful when dealing with difficult people because guess what? We’re difficult too!
While encouragement and counsel from God’s Word are important, there are also tangible ways we can handle the problems that come with ministry. When we are feeling overwhelmed, burned out, frustrated, or stressed while serving, what can we do?
Step One: pray! The reason is because you need Someone Who is bigger than you and your problems. You need the One who created you and gave you the ability to express emotions. Ministry is God’s work. When you start making it about you, you’re in it for the wrong reasons and your heart is not right. By praying, you’re inviting God into the problem. You’re seeking His guidance and His strength – not your own. You’re not trying to figure it out on your own, you’re going to Him and saying, “God, You already know the situation. Please guide me through this. Please tell me what to do.” We can pray for wisdom, just as James 1:5 tells us: “Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly and it will be given to him.” So, pray for wisdom and ask God to give you discernment and patience. Ask Him to soften your heart, and that way you will have the right heart and attitude going into it.
Step Two: Identify the problem clearly. Know what’s really going on. What is the root cause? Many times, when we have interpersonal conflicts in ministry, we get in our flesh and things trigger our emotions, but the root issue is not really what happened. Getting in our flesh and all our feelings are just the indicators that something deeper is going on. If you need help identifying the problem clearly, do what the psalmist did in Psalm 139:23-24. He asked God to search his heart and test him and see if there is any offensive way in him. And then he asked God to lead him into the right way. What is the root cause of what you’re feeling? Is it a spiritual issue? Is there something deeper going on in your heart? Is there some sin you need to confess? Is there an unresolved conflict or situation that has clouded your view of others? Are you struggling with some things you cannot control?
Step Three: Seek godly counsel. Proverbs 11:14 tells us, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls; But in an abundance of counselors, there is safety.” Do you have a trusted mentor you could consult? Is there a leader that you can go to or a ministry partner that can provide a godly perspective and give you godly advice?
These are steps we can take to do ministry better and to be better people to serve with. As we’re serving the Lord and ministering with and to others, we need to make sure we are spending time in God’s Word. A lot of ministry problems can lead to burnout if we’re not taking care of the situation. We need to make sure we’re taking care of ourselves physically and spiritually. We may also need to implement the setting of healthy boundaries. Are you taking time to rest? Are you taking time to spend with your family? Are you taking time for your own personal refreshment and restoration? These things can also help us to avoid division in ministry. Division of believers and divisive behavior hinders ministry effectiveness, and it grieves God’s heart. We need to be willing to work towards solutions that prioritize peace and unity. This is what we’re told in Ephesians 4:3, “Making every effort to keep the unity of the spirit through the bond of peace.” Be willing to compromise on preferences, but remain steadfast on biblical principles.
Sometimes it’s our motives that get in the way. Ask yourself the honest question of why you are serving – because it’s easy to get upset about the little things when you’re serving for yourself, or for attention, or because you simply feel like you’re supposed to check it off the list of religious obligations. When we analyze within our own hearts of why we’re serving, and we make sure we are serving for the right reasons, there will be a difference in our attitude. We will serve and minister to others because we want to bless them and serve the Lord out of the genuineness of our own heart. When we do this heart check on ourselves, it will be a little bit harder to get frustrated with the small things because we’re looking at the bigger picture.
It may seem silly that believers would have problems in ministry since they are serving the Lord and building God’s Kingdom, but remember, we still live in a fallen world. We’re still sinful people. We are not perfect. But isn’t it amazing that God uses imperfect people to do His work! We may not know how things will work out, but God will work it out the way it is supposed to be despite the problems we face with others. By the way, those problems remind us that we’re dependent on God. We need to trust that God can use those challenges for His glory and for growth in the ministry. Romans 8:28 tells us, “We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” Did you catch that little word “all”? That includes the good things and the bad things. Instead of looking at every problem in ministry as a frustration, try looking at every problem as an opportunity for growth. Be willing to look in your heart and receive the teaching and instruction God is giving you in those difficult and sticky situations.
When we handle problems in ministry with prayer, wisdom, and grace, we’re not only going to be able to resolve those issues but also model Christ-like leadership to those we serve as well as those with whom we serve. The people you are serving will pay attention to how those in ministry interact with one another. What example are you setting? Are you reflecting Christ in your words and actions? You may be the only picture of Jesus those people ever see. Let’s obey Ephesians 4:1 and “walk in a manner worthy of the calling.” Consider also that you may not be serving alongside other believers. We want to assume that those in ministry with us are our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, but we should not assume that. Just because someone is a member of a church does not mean they have a personal relationship with Jesus. Just because someone attends a Sunday School class does not mean they have received salvation. That’s why it’s so important that we share the Gospel to those we serve and to those with whom we serve. The Great Commission is not just for international mission trips; it’s the call to make disciples with even those in our homes and churches.